is it too late to heal?

oh my god, i have a date saturday night. i have no idea. the guy i met at st marks ale house on friday called me today, and asked if i wanted to do something sat night.. so i said alright. but man, oh man. i don't know how to date, i've never been on a grown up date before, and i dont know what's supposed to happen. plus i have that super crush.. and it just gets worse every day. he held my hand tonight and i was like "awwww" all melty like. i just want to hug him and be like "yr so adorable!" last night he asked me if i thought he lost weight since i met him, and i said no. so he asked if i thought he was too skinny and i was like "hell no" lol i loooove skinny boys. except his belly feels hot. not just skinny but toned and hot and oooh. anyway. i'm going to invite him out with us after work on halloween and maybe he'll come and it'll be a super good time, hanging out in a non work environment. but what about my date? ugh. he seems like a nice guy, but he's such a grown up, and i'm such a fuckin kid. like, what do you talk about on a date? i hope he asks questions.. bc i'm a fuckin loser, and i know i will freeze up and sit there like "uhhh." i definitely have to go sober. maybe i'll drink on the date, if it's like drinks or whatnot, but i have to be able to make sense and be alert, since i think that everyone i meet in a social environment, rather than by chance or through others, is a psycho. but yah. do you talk about past relationships, or why you dont have a significant other on a first date? like should i be prepared to explain that i haven't really dated in a long time, and that i'm kinda afraid to get back into that whole thing.. i mean, i know that work boy has potential, but thats different, i know i like him, and i know i'd like to spend more time with him, but i think it would be easier to have fun with him and see where things go than with this other bar guy. i don't *know* that i like this guy, i don't *know* that i want to get to know him better. but i also don't know that i don't.. ugh. but i really like the work boy, and i really dont know if i should be seeing someone else when i have my mind set on him. AHHH its all collapsing, i have to sleep.