is it too late to heal?

do you ever think that maybe god doesnt want you, bc he hasnt like approached you like he has crazy religious fanatics? i mean, they always say that something happened that caused them to awaken and meet god. i never had an experience with him. could it be that he has shunned me, and im not one of his chosen people? did you ever think that maybe the fantics are right? and us, who laugh at them, are the non chosen people, damned to eternal hell?