Tuesday, February 03, 2004
*hey sorrow, where are you? tomorrow just won't be the same without you here* mineral
i was soo productive today. first of all, i got up at 1045. i didnt say "fuck it" and go back to sleep, as i regularly would. i got up, and i got in the shower. and i went to rutgers. i got there at like 1:15, which was actually wayy earlier than i'd expected. went to the computer lab, looked up books on hamilton, paid my credit card bill online, checked how many minutes i have left on my phone.. blah blah blah. went to the library.. i went to the periodicals desk and got the week in review from the new york times. there were a whole bunch of ads for schools on LI. then i went and read indexes, and took notes on the books i got. that was fun. you cannot imagine how giddy reading stuff alexander hamilton wrote gets me. its like a weird elation. it makes me smile. he was so emotional and intense and opinionated and.. i dont know. he was a lot like me. *sigh* but time got away from me, so i had to run over to meet with jan about my thesis. she loves my ideas, and she told me to stop freaking out over my thesis, bc i've been preparing for this for like 6 years and i know my stuff, and there are a finite number of sources, so length isnt as important as i'm making it out to be.. she gave me some more suggestions on books to look at for background, and told me that i should look at hamilton's conception of free labor and the marketplace to formulate ideas on how his theories were incompatable with slavery. anyway. i finished up with her to find that BOTH history secretaries were out with the flu today, so i couldnt pick up my tuition remission card. way boo, because now i have to go back thursday. whatever though, i have a 9am server meeting thurs anyway, so i have to be responsible in the morning. so i went back to the computer lab and printed out cover letters. i applied to two more schools on-line. then i left. i was way hungry, i couldnt sit in front of the screen any longer. came back to brooklyn, went to rite aid for large envelopes, deposited all of my rutgers paychecks, went to mcdonalds, then to the deli for my cherry coke addiction. i came home and watched american idol with candace while catching up on each others last few days.. we watched everwood, while i put 7 more resumes in envelopes to mail out tomorrow. then we babbled about how so many people from our respective homes did nothing with their lives, and still live at home, or if not, they live off their parents who pay their rent or pay their school.. and how awkward it is to run into someone from high school and be like "yah, what are you up to these days?" and they're like "working at the deli, living at home.. not going to school. you?" and im like "well, im almost finished with my masters, im living with a friend in brooklyn, and im working full time." people are always like "thats so amazing, yr almost done with school! im so jealous that you live on yr own!" and im like.. yah. or they admire me for all ive accomplished at 23. i cannot handle that. ive surrounded myself with people who are also accomplishing and doing it on their own.. candace and kim and antonia and bart.. no one is living off their parents, none of us are taking hand outs. we're working hard to be what we want to be, on our own terms. then we watched queer as folk.
im tired. i have to get up at 1030 again tomorrow. ugh. i have another super long day.. therapy, post office, fingerprinting for teaching jobs (in fucking brooklyn heights, which is way out of the way for me and will take a good half hour to get there, plus waiting..), thrifting with kim (yay, i get to go from booklyn heights to the upper west side on the 1/9.. that should take at least an hour. ugh).. we heard about this thrift store in harlem where you buy clothes by the pound, for like fifty cents a pound. we're verrrrry excited.
i heard from the enigma today.. sent him a message when i got up, i asked him what day he was leaning toward for this week.. he said thursday. cross yr fingers! then i got another message at like 4:45, saying something like "what did you do to me to make me not be able to stop thinking about saturday?" i responded that i was flattered.. he made me smile. he always makes me smile. just wanna be the girl who supports you in everything you do.. the girl you come home to and cuddle with and think about while yr away. just wanna be that girl..
*you know it starts here, outside waiting in the cold.. kiss me once in the snow, i swear it never gets old, but i will promise you i can make it warmer next year* alkaline trio
i was soo productive today. first of all, i got up at 1045. i didnt say "fuck it" and go back to sleep, as i regularly would. i got up, and i got in the shower. and i went to rutgers. i got there at like 1:15, which was actually wayy earlier than i'd expected. went to the computer lab, looked up books on hamilton, paid my credit card bill online, checked how many minutes i have left on my phone.. blah blah blah. went to the library.. i went to the periodicals desk and got the week in review from the new york times. there were a whole bunch of ads for schools on LI. then i went and read indexes, and took notes on the books i got. that was fun. you cannot imagine how giddy reading stuff alexander hamilton wrote gets me. its like a weird elation. it makes me smile. he was so emotional and intense and opinionated and.. i dont know. he was a lot like me. *sigh* but time got away from me, so i had to run over to meet with jan about my thesis. she loves my ideas, and she told me to stop freaking out over my thesis, bc i've been preparing for this for like 6 years and i know my stuff, and there are a finite number of sources, so length isnt as important as i'm making it out to be.. she gave me some more suggestions on books to look at for background, and told me that i should look at hamilton's conception of free labor and the marketplace to formulate ideas on how his theories were incompatable with slavery. anyway. i finished up with her to find that BOTH history secretaries were out with the flu today, so i couldnt pick up my tuition remission card. way boo, because now i have to go back thursday. whatever though, i have a 9am server meeting thurs anyway, so i have to be responsible in the morning. so i went back to the computer lab and printed out cover letters. i applied to two more schools on-line. then i left. i was way hungry, i couldnt sit in front of the screen any longer. came back to brooklyn, went to rite aid for large envelopes, deposited all of my rutgers paychecks, went to mcdonalds, then to the deli for my cherry coke addiction. i came home and watched american idol with candace while catching up on each others last few days.. we watched everwood, while i put 7 more resumes in envelopes to mail out tomorrow. then we babbled about how so many people from our respective homes did nothing with their lives, and still live at home, or if not, they live off their parents who pay their rent or pay their school.. and how awkward it is to run into someone from high school and be like "yah, what are you up to these days?" and they're like "working at the deli, living at home.. not going to school. you?" and im like "well, im almost finished with my masters, im living with a friend in brooklyn, and im working full time." people are always like "thats so amazing, yr almost done with school! im so jealous that you live on yr own!" and im like.. yah. or they admire me for all ive accomplished at 23. i cannot handle that. ive surrounded myself with people who are also accomplishing and doing it on their own.. candace and kim and antonia and bart.. no one is living off their parents, none of us are taking hand outs. we're working hard to be what we want to be, on our own terms. then we watched queer as folk.
im tired. i have to get up at 1030 again tomorrow. ugh. i have another super long day.. therapy, post office, fingerprinting for teaching jobs (in fucking brooklyn heights, which is way out of the way for me and will take a good half hour to get there, plus waiting..), thrifting with kim (yay, i get to go from booklyn heights to the upper west side on the 1/9.. that should take at least an hour. ugh).. we heard about this thrift store in harlem where you buy clothes by the pound, for like fifty cents a pound. we're verrrrry excited.
i heard from the enigma today.. sent him a message when i got up, i asked him what day he was leaning toward for this week.. he said thursday. cross yr fingers! then i got another message at like 4:45, saying something like "what did you do to me to make me not be able to stop thinking about saturday?" i responded that i was flattered.. he made me smile. he always makes me smile. just wanna be the girl who supports you in everything you do.. the girl you come home to and cuddle with and think about while yr away. just wanna be that girl..
*you know it starts here, outside waiting in the cold.. kiss me once in the snow, i swear it never gets old, but i will promise you i can make it warmer next year* alkaline trio
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