Tuesday, March 09, 2004
*this basements a coffin, im buried alive i'll die in here just to be safe.. ill die in here.. just to be.. safe.*
dashboard confessional
AHHH!! i can finally play it!!! i can play "the places you have come to fear the most"!!!!!!! I CAN I CAN I CAN! and all along i thought i'd be a failure. but no. i took a nap, and then i said "benny.." (thats my guitars name) ".. we're gonna dooo this!" and we DID! i am beyond excited right now. BEYOND EXCITED!
i dont even CARE that you, mr. enigma, woke me up at 9:47 this morning, when i'd only gone to bed at 645, telling me that you were working on the lights in a hotel that was 40 stories and had a rooftop and a gorgeous view, and it would be even better than a theatre.. and when i responded "awww roof tops are hot, they are def on my list. i hope you enjoy yr view!" that wasnt good enough, so you responded "haha, that was the best fuck you ever, zing!" and i didnt get it. i didnt, i was like "i didnt say fuck you, did i?" cos, granted i had responded while i was half asleep.. so i guess you wrote something like "i told you that there was a beautiful rooftop view and you couldve been like ill be right there, but you were like enjoy yr view, like fuck you, i wont make you forget yr name again. did you get laid last night?" and i was like "whatever." seriously, i mean. way to prove that you only wanna fuck me. but i overlooked that, and i said "of course i'll come over there and make you forget yr name, im always up for that, and i have my new yellow cardigan on.." and i guess it made you happy that i'd decided to buy it and you really wanted me to come see you, but you didnt get my message and by the time i sent you another one, you were on yr way home. you said you'd be back at the same place working tomorrow... so i said i would come by then. cos you know why? COS I DO THIS TO MYSELF. cos i know that you want one thing, and i know it keeps you coming around, and i know.. i know that if i stopped there would be a discussion and i might actually have to let on that YOU ARE FUCKING KILLING ME but i need you, and if this is the only way i can have you then its what i settle for. BUT DO I NEED YOU? why why why.....
anyway. im going back to benny, who loves me unconditionally, and plays my song, my ANTHEM.. "perfect makeup but yr barely scraping by, but yr barely scraping by..." only i can still fake it hard enough to please everyone but myself. AND THE GRAVE THAT YOU REFUSE TO LEAVE.... yah, thats me. burying myself alive, at all times...
dashboard confessional
AHHH!! i can finally play it!!! i can play "the places you have come to fear the most"!!!!!!! I CAN I CAN I CAN! and all along i thought i'd be a failure. but no. i took a nap, and then i said "benny.." (thats my guitars name) ".. we're gonna dooo this!" and we DID! i am beyond excited right now. BEYOND EXCITED!
i dont even CARE that you, mr. enigma, woke me up at 9:47 this morning, when i'd only gone to bed at 645, telling me that you were working on the lights in a hotel that was 40 stories and had a rooftop and a gorgeous view, and it would be even better than a theatre.. and when i responded "awww roof tops are hot, they are def on my list. i hope you enjoy yr view!" that wasnt good enough, so you responded "haha, that was the best fuck you ever, zing!" and i didnt get it. i didnt, i was like "i didnt say fuck you, did i?" cos, granted i had responded while i was half asleep.. so i guess you wrote something like "i told you that there was a beautiful rooftop view and you couldve been like ill be right there, but you were like enjoy yr view, like fuck you, i wont make you forget yr name again. did you get laid last night?" and i was like "whatever." seriously, i mean. way to prove that you only wanna fuck me. but i overlooked that, and i said "of course i'll come over there and make you forget yr name, im always up for that, and i have my new yellow cardigan on.." and i guess it made you happy that i'd decided to buy it and you really wanted me to come see you, but you didnt get my message and by the time i sent you another one, you were on yr way home. you said you'd be back at the same place working tomorrow... so i said i would come by then. cos you know why? COS I DO THIS TO MYSELF. cos i know that you want one thing, and i know it keeps you coming around, and i know.. i know that if i stopped there would be a discussion and i might actually have to let on that YOU ARE FUCKING KILLING ME but i need you, and if this is the only way i can have you then its what i settle for. BUT DO I NEED YOU? why why why.....
anyway. im going back to benny, who loves me unconditionally, and plays my song, my ANTHEM.. "perfect makeup but yr barely scraping by, but yr barely scraping by..." only i can still fake it hard enough to please everyone but myself. AND THE GRAVE THAT YOU REFUSE TO LEAVE.... yah, thats me. burying myself alive, at all times...
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