Wednesday, August 18, 2004
ok, so at first, i was a little upset that the olympics were on, bc conan wasnt. it annoyed me. but now im sooo drawn in to womens gymnastics alternating with womens swimming. im watching the russian womens team on the balance beam.. and i know this is gonna sound bizarre, and immature, but the russian women really need to do something about their pubes. they have big poofs in their leotards. i mean, ive just noticed this. perhaps its normal, and i will pay better attention during the next team's go at the beam. eh ok its all of them. im glad im not a gymnast. i would be way self conscious about my leotard.
moving along.... so yah. i really dont have anything to say. i was thinking about smoking some more, since im clearly very involved in this olympics thing and, despite the fact that my eyes burn and im exhausted, i do not see sleep in my future. this is maybe the one thing i hate about myself, the way i get totally drawn into things, and i mean.. i sit here and i identify that im tired and dont even have a remote interest in these events, but i cannot do anything about it. im not even looking at the screen when i type this. im totally enmeshed in this insane balance beam... ooooh an incredible dismount.... she did a little bad on her supposedly incredible dismount. 9.62. oh.my.god. this is fucking intense.
i was kinda sad tonight. i hate going to work these days, its unfun. you already know that. so i sent the enigma a text (bc i eventually heard from him about the book) asking him to please say something that would make me happy.. so he was like 'whats wrong? a beautiful gifted girl like yrself should never be upset.' eh. it made me smile, but it was a weak smile.
ooooooh MENS swimming!! ooh. some of these olympians are hotttttt!! this phelps american dude, wow. thats a hottttt body. wow. you know who has a hot body? derek. im thinking it would be ok to hook up with him again before im gone. i might make an attempt at drinks after work one night.
anyway. i think perhaps i will research MA programs for the boy, even though i dont know why im extending myself to him, when no matter what he will never want to be with me or trust me or whatever. oh, i should just kill myself.
moving along.... so yah. i really dont have anything to say. i was thinking about smoking some more, since im clearly very involved in this olympics thing and, despite the fact that my eyes burn and im exhausted, i do not see sleep in my future. this is maybe the one thing i hate about myself, the way i get totally drawn into things, and i mean.. i sit here and i identify that im tired and dont even have a remote interest in these events, but i cannot do anything about it. im not even looking at the screen when i type this. im totally enmeshed in this insane balance beam... ooooh an incredible dismount.... she did a little bad on her supposedly incredible dismount. 9.62. oh.my.god. this is fucking intense.
i was kinda sad tonight. i hate going to work these days, its unfun. you already know that. so i sent the enigma a text (bc i eventually heard from him about the book) asking him to please say something that would make me happy.. so he was like 'whats wrong? a beautiful gifted girl like yrself should never be upset.' eh. it made me smile, but it was a weak smile.
ooooooh MENS swimming!! ooh. some of these olympians are hotttttt!! this phelps american dude, wow. thats a hottttt body. wow. you know who has a hot body? derek. im thinking it would be ok to hook up with him again before im gone. i might make an attempt at drinks after work one night.
anyway. i think perhaps i will research MA programs for the boy, even though i dont know why im extending myself to him, when no matter what he will never want to be with me or trust me or whatever. oh, i should just kill myself.
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