Wednesday, November 28, 2007
right now i am super slow on the blog. mainly because i'm tired all the time. and tired of saying the same things.
here is my update: snapcase was amazing on sunday. encore of "incarnation". good times! i slept like 2 hours that night but it was worth it, seeing as they insisted it would be the last time they ever played. and i hadn't seen them since august 97! bringing it back to the old days of straight edge hardcore.
i have made it through most of the week without really talking to tom. we emailed a bunch at work about lucid dreams and out of body experiences, but not many text messages. last night a few during the nets game. today none. i really am thinking of him less, but it's not helping to fill the void he left when he walked out on us. blah.
last night i was sleeping peacefully until i was awoken at 4:27 by a text from joe. he wanted to come over. i said ok. he was just getting off work and had to go back in early. he asked if he could sleep on my couch, but i knew better. so he got here, he showered, he came into my bed. we talked, we flirted, he pinned me. he kept mentioning his girlfriend. i didn't make a move. i wanted to. he kept telling me he was tempted, but was being good. what the hell was he doing in my bed if he wanted to be good, anyway? what is up with boys? you come to my bed and you better be prepared to disrobe. but anyway, he resisted until it was time for me to get up and shower. we fooled around but no kissing (weird) and no lovin. i wanted him bad. like BAD. but the 11 month dry spell continues with no end in sight. he was a good houseguest, though. he made my bed and hung his towel on the rack before he left this morning. when i went to work he was falling asleep.
i just got off the phone with derek from match. i don't know if i like his voice. he only talked to me for like 25 minutes. i don't know if meeting him will be worth it because he lives far and i don't feel like amazed by our conversation. but who knows. i felt amazed by conversation with justin and i fled that date, and i also felt amazed by the marathon conversations i had with mike2, but then it turned out he was obsessed with his fidelity funds. so who knows.
BRAND NEW THIS WEEKEND! oh my god, this time in three days i will be in HEAVEN. saturday. brand new + drunk + casinos = heaven. yes.
17 days til i see tom and say goodbye. dionne hasn't responded to my email with my plans to kiss him goodbye. i sent it on the 19th, when i got home from seeing bright eyes. this makes me somewhat sad. she wrote me sunday saying she was running out to the giants game but would respond later.. but no response. still. it's wednesday. so who knows. i don't want to say goodbye. but i feel good in the fact that i wanted joe so badly this morning. maybe this means i can move on. maybe it just means i'm still stuck on joe, though. 10 years of history...
that will be all. it's time for me to veg for an hour and then pass the fuck out. so tired. so so tired...
(i still love you tom)
here is my update: snapcase was amazing on sunday. encore of "incarnation". good times! i slept like 2 hours that night but it was worth it, seeing as they insisted it would be the last time they ever played. and i hadn't seen them since august 97! bringing it back to the old days of straight edge hardcore.
i have made it through most of the week without really talking to tom. we emailed a bunch at work about lucid dreams and out of body experiences, but not many text messages. last night a few during the nets game. today none. i really am thinking of him less, but it's not helping to fill the void he left when he walked out on us. blah.
last night i was sleeping peacefully until i was awoken at 4:27 by a text from joe. he wanted to come over. i said ok. he was just getting off work and had to go back in early. he asked if he could sleep on my couch, but i knew better. so he got here, he showered, he came into my bed. we talked, we flirted, he pinned me. he kept mentioning his girlfriend. i didn't make a move. i wanted to. he kept telling me he was tempted, but was being good. what the hell was he doing in my bed if he wanted to be good, anyway? what is up with boys? you come to my bed and you better be prepared to disrobe. but anyway, he resisted until it was time for me to get up and shower. we fooled around but no kissing (weird) and no lovin. i wanted him bad. like BAD. but the 11 month dry spell continues with no end in sight. he was a good houseguest, though. he made my bed and hung his towel on the rack before he left this morning. when i went to work he was falling asleep.
i just got off the phone with derek from match. i don't know if i like his voice. he only talked to me for like 25 minutes. i don't know if meeting him will be worth it because he lives far and i don't feel like amazed by our conversation. but who knows. i felt amazed by conversation with justin and i fled that date, and i also felt amazed by the marathon conversations i had with mike2, but then it turned out he was obsessed with his fidelity funds. so who knows.
BRAND NEW THIS WEEKEND! oh my god, this time in three days i will be in HEAVEN. saturday. brand new + drunk + casinos = heaven. yes.
17 days til i see tom and say goodbye. dionne hasn't responded to my email with my plans to kiss him goodbye. i sent it on the 19th, when i got home from seeing bright eyes. this makes me somewhat sad. she wrote me sunday saying she was running out to the giants game but would respond later.. but no response. still. it's wednesday. so who knows. i don't want to say goodbye. but i feel good in the fact that i wanted joe so badly this morning. maybe this means i can move on. maybe it just means i'm still stuck on joe, though. 10 years of history...
that will be all. it's time for me to veg for an hour and then pass the fuck out. so tired. so so tired...
(i still love you tom)
Subscribe to Comments [Atom]